Drake and Dr Bell
by SmileofPureSunshine
Summary: Drake has disappeared. No need to worry, fans, he's just with the cute and cuddly... Dr. Bell! ?
1. Prologue

**Drake and Dr. Bell**

_**Prologue**_

_Drake Bell. You all know who he is. You all think he's hot. And you all think he sounds like Jason Mraz when he sings. Not me! Oral exams on him at two. Fans wreak havoc to find him. Why doesn't anyone love Josh? _

"Josh, what are you writing? Not your stupid journal again. You just write imaginary stuff in there. I read it one time and I couldn't stop laughing." Drake came into the room and Josh quickly hid his journal.

"AAAHHHHH!!!!" Josh jumped on his brother and clobbered him. "Oh, no, I've killed him. Yes! Now I can write my journal in peace."

"Oh, yeah?" Drake said rather weakly.

"Why won't you die? Drake, I need a girl. And you always take them all, so that's why I have an imaginary journal. Cause I imagine having a girl. Do you understand that? Drake?"

But Drake had disappeared.


	2. You Look Like A Pimple

_**Chapter 1**_

"Are you Drake Bell?"

Drake looked up into the face of a cute old man that looked oddly like Ian Richardson. "Uh, yeah. Who the heck wants to know? And where am I? The last I remember was me saying 'oi' to Josh."

"First, you didn't say oi to your brother Joshua. You said 'oh, yeah'."

"Oh, yeah."

"And I'm Dr. Bell. You are at the University of London, my office."

"Okay, and why and how am I in your office in London? London, oh my God!" He jumped up and ran into a wall repeatedly, until Dr. Bell stopped him by running into him, knocking him down, and fake strangling him.

"Wow, you're pretty strong for an old man!"

"I work out every spare moment I get. Now the reason you are here is because you are my descendent."

"You mean, you're my dad?"

"No, I'm like your great great great great great great great great great…"

"Ok, I get your gist. You're really old."

"I'm from the past."

"You're really old."

"Yes, that's basically it. Now come on."

"But what about, Josh? I'll bet he'll want to come on the super adventure with our really old ancestor."

"I'm only _your_ ancestor, not his. And when did I say this was an adventure, young man?"

"Never, but my future self who has already done this super adventure, told me."

"That's just confusing, so stop it. Now, I suppose you can bring two of your people from the future to help you in your quest. Who do you choose?"

"Sarah and Angela."

"Who are they, may I ask?"

"Two hot girls."

"Pick two _useful_ people."

Drake whapped Dr. Bell in the face. "They are the most useful people I know. They can kiss you when you need them too, and make popcorn, and go to the movies… And I could name a hundred more useful things."

"Useful to this quest, I mean." Dr. Bell rubbed his swelling face.

"Haha. You look like a pimple."

"Well, you are a very aggravating young man."

"Too bad, so sad, hope I didn't make you mad. But of course, I did, which was what I planned to do."

"I do not see how you have any girlfriends if you act so uncaring."

"Oh, but I'm not uncaring towards them. Only to you and Josh, and…. Others."

Dr. Bell just walked out of the office and locked the door on Drake.


	3. I lost you on Drake

_**Chapter Two**_

The door opened and Dr. Bell stepped lightly in with a tray of deliciously smelling cookies.

"Are those for me?" Drake said dreamily.

"No. They're for your people that you brought back here with you to help you on your adventure."

"Sarah and Angela? Wow! You are one awesome ancestor…" He stopped suddenly as two figures shrouded in black came in the door.

"We have come for you, Drake Bell. You will never escape." The figures went into a series of odd cackles that sounded strangely like…

"Josh and Megan? What are you guys doing here? Where's my girlfriends?" Drake's face was utterly hot.

"Whoa, Drake, calm down. You're getting overheated." Josh liked the thought of making Drake explode. So he laughed, and he laughed, and he…

"Joshua, stop that this instance. I'm your father and you must listen to me." Dr. Bell smiled mischievously.

Drake became extremely worried and looked Bell straight in the eye. "You said you weren't his ancestor. What's going on, buddy?"

"I lied."

"Oh." He backed off. "I'm sorry about that. I just thought that all people in the past never lied. But I guess I was wrong." He sighed.

"Is that an insult, my young padawan?"

"Wait, does this mean I get a lightsaber? OMG! Josh, I get a lightsaber!" Drake jumped up and down and skipped rope and Josh looked totally like 'what?'

Josh calmly answered to his question with a simple, "NO! And don't ever again say OMG. Only girls say it that way."

"I don't really think that's fair." Drake made puppy eyes at the observer. Aww! OMG, he's cute! Poor, poor, Drake… Fine, guys can always use OMG cause it saves word space, and he's cute.

Dr. Bell sighed depressingly. Drake was evidently not going to be a big addition in the mystery. He had obviously not inherited the family's serious mindedness, self-control, and aptitude for crime. He must train him.

"Drake, boy, calm down. I just need you to calm down." Drake sat down hesitantly and smiled wickedly sweet.

"Yeah, grandpa? What do you need? What do you want? I'm here to help you."

"Shorty Mc Short's Shorts," shouted Josh out of the blue. "Hey, I said it! Drake, I said it!"

"Great, whatever. Wait, you said it! But can you say: the pellet with the poison is in the flagon with the dragon and the chalice of the palace has the brew that is true? Work on that for awhile," Drake answered back. He was feeling quite evil today.

Drake felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned to see Dr. Bell beckoning him to a side room. He followed him into the room and was ushered into a wheeled comfy chair. Dr. Bell sat across from him looking as serious as Dr. Bell can be.

"Drake, I brought you here because I need your help. My former assistant, Arthur Doyle, has left me for, how shall I say it without blemishing his good reputation, a wife. Or maybe a couple, but anyway, he refuses to help me because of previous engagements related to women, so you must. You are my descendent and you have a responsibility to your family name. Only once must you do something for your relatives, and then you are free from our curse, and I'm sure you haven't done anything yet."

"Ok, you lost me on Drake. But that's okay. I don't really care. I think it's about time you started us on the actual adventure now. Cause I'm reeally bored." He yawned, stuck his feet lazily on the table and fell asleep.

And Dr. Bell did the only thing humanly possible. He took a sub sandwich from his desk and began eating.


	4. Tunnel of Love

_**Chapter Three**_

Drake woke to find himself inside a tunnel. Written across the walls were the words "Tunnel of Love". There was a girl sitting there, staring at him and, Drake noticed happily, was really hot.

"Drake Parker, I have need of your assistance in a matter of extreme importance. Will you help me?"

"Why did you call me Parker?"

"Because that is your real last name. You have been lied to for centuries, and made to think that you are a Bell. You mustn't help Dr. Bell. He is your enemy. He wants you to destroy your family."

Drake sat up and leaned against the wall of the tunnel. There was definitely some chemistry between this strange, beautiful girl and him.

"And who are you may I ask, that you would want to help me not destroy my family?"

She smiled. Drake couldn't tell if it was a smile of evil or good.

"Drake, dearest, I am your betrothed. You family and you are very important to me. Come with me to meet them, the real ones. Come join us in our fight for life." As she had been saying this she had been moving closer to Drake. "Come with me, Drake, and join the side of power."

She brought her lips towards his-but as she spoke the last part he stuck his finger between his mouth and hers.

"I'm sorry, but no."

Her eyes looked confused and full of rage. "What do you mean no? This is your dream, to have power and beautiful women, isn't it? Why are you giving it up?"

"I mean no, I'm not coming on the dark side of the force. This is just like Star Wars and I can tell you're the bad guy because you were trying to lure me to your side with power. Of course that's my dream. It's Josh's too. But I don't want a girl that doesn't really love me and is just trying to use me for her own devious purposes. I knew you were evil the second you said my name was Drake Parker. And I was only more convinced when you said I had been lied to for centuries, which is impossible because I'm eighteen. That's not even two decades. God, I'm smart!"

The girl looked at him, her eyes gleaming with hate and revenge. "This isn't the last you've seen of me, Drake Bell!" Then she disappeared.

Drake climbed calmly out of the tunnel and walked towards Dr. Bell's office.


	5. Tigers in a Tropical Storm

_**Chapter Four**_

"Drake, hold your head up!" Dr. Bell was getting impatient. Megan, Josh, and Drake were all acting like tigers in a tropical storm.

"Growl! Roar!" they yelled and pranced across the desk.

"I will not give you cookies if you do not sit down and listen to me!" There was immediate silence. The three teenagers sat quietly into their chairs and stared provokingly at the older man.

"If you don't stop it…" But it was too late. Dr. Bell went into a fit of unsettling laughter. It also set the three laughing as well at their handiwork. At least their laughter wasn't unsettling.

When Dr. Bell could speak, "I need to tell you about the case." He sounded hoarse and frustrated. "This is a very strange and baffling case. Everyone thought that I would be able to figure it out straight away but it wasn't so easy. As you might know, it's pretty embarrassing to me to not be able to solve this case in the time everyone expects of me."

"On to the case, old timer." This was Josh, though something as heartless as that would be expected of Drake, not sweet Josh.

Drake said, "Yeah, I basically knew all that stuff already." Megan rolled her eyes at him and he just shrugged. He didn't care what Megan thought of him. She was never going to say he was smart no matter what, so why care?

"All right, young men. The case is simply this: A beautiful young woman-

"You mean hot?" Drake interrupted casually. He did this all the time so it was casual.

"A beautiful young woman," Dr. Bell started again.

"Sexy?"

"I don't know what you're talking about. Stop interrupting me. It's impolite. You wanted me to tell you the case so be quiet and listen."

"All right, all right. Tell me about the _beautiful_ young woman."

Dr. Bell smiled. He was getting these kids in hand. Though he wondered about the sister. She hadn't talked much. Maybe she was really plotting something under that sweet smile, some evil scheme to play on him and drive him over the deep end. He really hadn't wanted to go into the past to get one of his descendants. He thought that if he had a little more time he could figure out the case by himself. But the police had insisted and you were asking for trouble going against the police.

"The woman, her name being Carmen Stealth, walked into the London Museum one night, two days ago, and stole the painting 'Tiger in a Tropical Storm' by Henry Rousseau. You may have heard of it schooling facilities, if you even go to them."

"We do!" Megan said indignantly. "Why are you assuming that we are idiots? We should know more than you cause we're in the future. What do you think of that, Mr. Bell?"

"I think children should be seen and not heard, especially in you three's cases."

"I thought you needed our help. If we can't speak than we can't give out solutions." She had outwitted him. Or so she thought.

"Child, you are mistaken. I did not want to bring you here. I don't want your help. The police of Scotland Yard ordered me to get some help on the case. The only people I could think of trusting besides Arthur Doyle and myself were my own family. As of yet I do not have a family, so I went into the future to get me descendants. But I only did it to satisfy the police. All I want you to do is look like you're helping me and let me do all the work. If you would do that, I might be the happiest man in the world. You know, I have never liked children and now I know why."

This set off something in the three's hearts. A spark to please. They felt they could not bear to be the reason anyone wouldn't want to have children. And if Dr. Bell didn't want to have children… Well, then they wouldn't exist.

"We will do whatever you say," Drake said for all of them.

"So, what is the mystery? You've got the girl's name, and you know what she and where. What is there to figure out?" Josh asked sensibly.

"That's why it's so baffling! It's too simple. There must be some bigger crime behind it that I don't know of. And that is what I must find out. That is why I sent for you. And that is why I might lose my reputation as the greatest detective of all time. I do hope you understand." He put his hand wearily to his head and rubbed it feverishly.

"Are you sick?" Megan asked, the tint of worry in her voice. If it's worry for Dr. Bell or for herself is unknown.

Dr. Bell's answer to that was to throw up on the desk. He looked pale and tired.

"I was worried something like this would happen. Now I have to clean it up!" Megan lifted Dr. Bell off the desk and carried him into his bathroom/bedroom attached to the office.


End file.
